Couples/Marriage Counseling

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  Includes assessment of relationship goals, communication styles, and ways that couples manage conflict. Counseling is used to trouble-shoot the patterns of thinking and behavior that are causing conflict, and then to put into place new patterns of interacting that will lead to lasting relationship satisfaction.  

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 Marriage/Relationship CounselingIf you are seeking marriage counseling, then most likely you're relationship has reached a very uncertain and uncomfortable place. In fact, it might have become painful or even miserable. Maybe you are worried that you will have to be unhappy for the rest of your relationship or the rest of your life. Maybe you are worried that you are losing yourself and that you are far away from the reason that you got married and the life that you wanted together. My first piece of advice is this: Don't panic! When couples panic, they feel hopeless, boxed in, and they treat each other badly. Although it is not uncommon for marriage to get to this difficult place, the right kind of work can get it back on track. My counseling services are designed to help you figure out what is missing, communicate with each other in a way that is positive and encouraging, and develop tools that help you feel good about yourself and great about being in your marriage. I help couples work smart, not just hard, so that they enjoy the changes they are making, and the changes actually make a difference. 

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10 Common Reasons Couples Seek Counseling (and where counseling can help!)

  •  Communication problems (lack of understanding, inability to talk without fighting)
  • Differences in values (disagreement about what is important)
  • Infidelity, cheating, jealousy
  • Conflict over careers and balancing work and family
  • Trouble or stress with each others’ family
  • Broken promises, unfulfilled expectations
  • Alcohol and substance use issues 
  • Financial struggles
  • Parenting problems
  • Feeling disconnected from each other

Frequently Asked Questions About Marriage/Couples Counseling

How long does it take?

Most couples report positive change in the very first 1 or 2 sessions and feel ready to graduate from counseling within about 6 to 8 sessions. Some couples get what they want out of counseling in fewer than 6 sessions, and some couples go much longer. 

How do we know if counseling will help us?

The truth is that not all marriages last, but the people who do stay happily married will tell you that they have gone through hard times and that it takes work. Counseling is not a guarantee, but you can only work on it while you are still together. You won’t likely have a second chance with each other if your relationship ends. 

What happens in marriage/Couples counseling?

Some of our time will be spent having honest discussions about what is not working and what is bothering you. I will ask you questions that help you gain more clarity about the problems you are facing, and we will talk about the things you can do to fix them. Sometimes I give homework to help you think or practice new skills.